Dark Night of the Soul

Updated from February, 2011.   Now in the tenth year of what I thought was some kind of purgatory, it may actually be a recovery period after the Dark Night of the Soul.  And everything has been right in front of my eyes the whole time.  Even Krishna is a block away.  I'm not claiming to be "recovered" from comatic slumber or even at the point of letting go of it all.  But there is a pull toward facing Truth, one that is completely beyond reason and totally has my attention... as much as I'm able to give of it.  But the detail is at least more blinding than my own thoughts.  It's mesmerizing.  I think the path toward this was set a long time ago, as I've never completely bought into the facade that seems to be screaming fake everywhere I look.  Last Friday was bizarro!  "I" could count the number of bats of an eyelash on my friend at a party...  the more "I" felt ignored, the more I was alive.  It's a miracle.